Mamma Mia, That’s A Spicy Nintendo Theme Park

Wahoo, the Super Nintendo World theme park is officially opening early next year, and based on the pics, mamma mia, does it look 😘👌. 

The official Nintendo branded expansion of Universal Studios Japan, which costs just a small sum of $580 million USD, is situated next to Hogwarts and brimming with colour. From shiny rotating gold coins and question mark blocks on the wall to goombas, piranha plants, bullet bills and koopa troopas doing their silly little dance, it all looks ripped straight out of Super Mario 3D World

You enter the park from Peach’s Castle and a Mario-like brick tunnel, head down brightly golden brick roads and across clean green lawns. Peep the baby blue lamps, too. In your surroundings, you can spot green pipes leading to god knows where, a gnome-like home in the shape of a Toad, POW switches, an icy terrain, and a foreboding spiky, grey brick fortress with a Bowser-shaped mouth entrance—Aka Bowser’s Castle. 

If you’re one of the lucky few in Japan—or if Australia sets up a travel bubble with the country in the next few months—when Super Nintendo World opens on the 4th of February, you’ll be able to check out two Nintendo official rides: a Mario Kart ride and a Yoshi’s Adventure ride. The Mario Kart ride, called Koopa’s Challenge, is an “on the rails” ride, a bit like the Neon Genesis Evangelion themed one at USJ from a few years ago. 

Per the video by Bloomberg below, the ride, which took six years to make, begins inside Bowser’s Castle, where you’ll be met with a colossal statue of the spiky simp for Princess Peach and a row of trophies in the shape of each of the Mario Kart cups lined up against the wall. The ride itself features you and three other people in a kart, with an AR headset and steering wheel, racing through one of two tracks. Each track begins in Bowser’s Castle and circuits through a slideshow of iconic Mario Kart tracks, including, ofc, Rainbow Road.

The jury is still out on what exactly the Yoshi’s Adventure ride is but if it’s ~anything~ like my favourite lil baby game Yoshi’s Woolly World, or uses similar music, I’m gonna 1UP from sheer excitement. And, perhaps, while the Yoshi of Super Nintendo World could very well be as eerily and uncannily lifelike as the rest of the mise en scène of Nintendo and USJ’s Mushroom Kingdom come to life, it also raises a v important question: will Yoshi’s skin be slimy? How will they translate Yoshi’s mlems and the way he sticky his tonguey out real good IRL? Only time and Nintendo magic will tell. 

Going forward and according to Bloomberg, Nintendo are planning on opening a Donkey Kong themed world at USJ, where I hope the entire theme park soundtrack is just this. In the meantime, I’ll be having some thinky thoughts on an Animal Crossing world and Hyrule Kingdom, and be micro-analysing the fuck out of the full photos taken from Super Nintendo World at Universal Studios Japan below, courtesy of Nintendo themselves. 

Julian Rizzo-Smith is a writer and producer. He also claims to be a vine historian, avid connoisseur of low-fi beats, indie hip hop and Kermit memes. In a perfect world, he’d be married to Tyler the Creator, own an Arcanine and a Lapras, and don his own Sailor Scouts uniform. He tweets @GayWeebDisaster, which is also, coincidentally, how one might describe him.